8 Strategies To Becoming The Kind Of Person Others Want To Be Around
06 April 2015
Relationships are the foundation of our society. We have them in our homes, schools and even work. We overlook opportunities to grow important relationships that could easily lead to our success. Why? Because people don’t want to be around us. They don’t want to listen to us, teach us, do business with us and this is something we cannot fix without considering the other person. So here are 8 strategies to help you get started on becoming a person that people want to succeed with.
Sometimes people smile at you but you have no idea what they are going through. People shed the same blood and tears you are able to shed. People get offended the same way you get offended when something awful was said. Always walk a mile in someone else’s shoes before you think of judging them.
Things you would never want said to you, don’t say them to others. It’s an easy thing to just state, but we often overlook this. I personally am not good at this at times causing me to re-learn this lesson the hard way. If you are thoughtless, or don’t care about what you do around people, don’t expect them to give a care in the world about what they do around you. If your roommate is trying to study for their finals and you have the TV turned up to the highest volume… don’t be surprised that on the night before you have some important job interview that they host a party in your room.
You don’t want to be around people that don’t support you. People have dreams, ideas, suggestions just like you and need you to affirm them when it counts. Otherwise they will shut you out of their lives. You will wonder why this person shares things with other people and not with you. Why should they care about the relationship if that relationship is only about you?
Keeping up false appearances for gain or other ill intentions is something everyone avoids. Meaning they avoid people who do that. The moment you smell fake, they take off like the road runner. My secondary school math teacher used to say, “pretenders are worse than murderers”. And it’s true. It’s always better the devil you know than the angel you do not know.
If life is all about you, then you do not need relationships. You are better off carrying a mirror everywhere you go, because the only person who is capable of tolerating a you… has to be you. If you want someone to find your stories amazing, you must find their’s amazing just as well. It’s a simple trade off. People can only put up with an egocentric person for so long.
The people around you aren’t perfect, but more importantly, you aren’t too. If someone should learn to live with the person you are, why wouldn’t you want to learn to live with someone else? It’s strange that sometimes the people we look down on the most, willingly come through for us when we least expect them to. Appreciate people for who they are and you will live a happier life.
I easily dismiss growing a relationship that isn’t fundamentally based on respect. Be it business or personal, is it worth it growing a relationship where the other person doesn’t respect you? We are meant to exist in community, yet we behave like we don’t need to. No one needs to tolerate you or your behavior. It’s a choice. They can easily decide to no longer be associated to you because of a lack of respect. That is a gift that people who are offended by you give you. Your space.
Not just wealth, but knowledge. Not just wisdom, but hope. There is so much power in interaction that all success is fundamentally based on. If you want to make it in life, you must be a person that gives more than you expect in return. Again, I’m not talking about digging into your wallet. People who just take are generally avoided. Look at your own life. Who do you tend to hang out with a lot more? Those that give, or those that take? Which one are you? How has this impacted your life?
There are a lot more strategies to list here. I’m convinced that part of your self-development journey, is to establish and grow meaning relationships that will shorten the time it will take you to achieve your goals. I would love to know what you think about this below.
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