The Resistance To Change Is Real
29 May 2017
By far the greatest ongoing challenge you face as a person determined to accomplish anything grand or significant to you is change. Never forget this one important truth: The person you are going into a pursuit… is never the same person that comes out of it.
But this is obviously hard to imagine if you aren’t used to pursuing big goals, right? However, it is not hard to imagine if you look back to your recent past.
Are you out of college? Would you say you now know and understand more than you did when you enrolled?
Sounds like a silly question I know.
How about this: Are you employed? Have you worked in the same place for over a year? If you could turn back time and go back to the day you were first interviewed… knowing what you know now… do you think you would perform better than you did at the time?
We take for granted our already existing tendency to change and adapt. We just don’t know how to always direct it in the way we would want it to work for us.
We must change in order to go through college successfully. We must change in order to acquire and maintain new job opportunities every time we seek them.
I know someone that graduated with a degree in Commerce several years ago. I’m addicted to computers so most of the time when I talked about computer related topics… that person easily got bored and would insist we changed the subject.
Today, that person works in the finance department of an IT company and knows more about server computing and networking than I do.
We are creatures of habit. We like rhythms in our lives. Once we learn something new (that requires some action), we get into a groove… we usually stay in that groove until some internal or external force stops that groove.
You are obviously aware that artists are artists by the sole fact that they work with paints. Footballers are footballers by the sole fact that they play football. Bankers bank. Teachers teach. Runners run. Business people do business.
We are defined by what we do. Not what we feel. Not what we like. Not what anyone says. But by what we do.
You can tell yourself that you are not a winner… but that isn’t just true because you are thinking it… but more importantly, because you are not doing it.
There are way too many people who are business owners in thought… but have no experience to show for it.
There are way too many people who are dream chasers by desire to be… but not by action taken.
It’s hard to break a habit you have been conditioned to accept in your life for as long as you have been doing it.
So as a dreamer… you truly are your own worst enemy.
Unless of course you learn to take control of your everyday actions. You must figure out a way to adopt habits that are aligned with what you desire. Then slowly eliminate those habits that do not add value to the life you wish to have.
Do you know how impossible it is to become someone who you are not trying to be?
How easy is it to be a bestselling author if writing is something you DON’T want to get good at? How easy is it to be an employer if your mind thinks only like an employee? How easy is it to be a successful business person if you think very little of the actual business development process?
I have seen people boomerang a lot.
That is: they set out on a journey to accomplish something because they are frustrated with what they are going through now… only to come right back to where they started because that life they thought they wanted is just too difficult to adapt to.
Better come back to a life you didn’t want than to pursue one you aren’t sure you want, right?
The resistance to change is real.
Being a broke but optimistic entreprenuer is going to be hell unless this is something you know want to do.
By the way, for the broke entrepreneur scenario… it’s not as though you are accepting the hardship as a way of life. No. But you already understand that it is part and parcel of the entire experience. You aren’t “cherry-picking” your entrepreneurial experience. You are taking it all in. The good days and the bad days.
Once you fully embrace the person you need to become… strangely enough… the burden of the pursuit becomes much lighter.
The resistance to change is real even for those around you.
When people are used to seeing one version of you… it becomes very difficult for them to see you as someone else. You will always be a child, intern or inexperienced to many of the eyes of those who have known that version of you for a very long time.
This is normal. But sometimes it is a threat to your efforts.
Because if you allow some of these people to talk into your life and influence you decision making… if they don’t want you to change… you will have a frustrating time.
Many dreamers feel like “loners”. People who seem to be pursuing their goals in secret or alone. It’s because they cannot face the criticism and the forces trying to oppose their desire to change. That force intentionally(or unintentionally) tries to influence them to stop and turn back.
A family where the parents are doctors won’t easily accept their daughter’s dream to become a cartoon artist.
A family of high earning employed parents may not necessarily be ready to accept a son’s decision to open a business.
One of the more obvious reasons why we have these situations in the households is because the parents often know little to nothing about the field the child wishes to explore. There is a fear of failure and a natural tendency to protect from disaster.
It is then up to the child to realize that he or she is going to have to then ACTIVELY seek out those who have extensive knowledge on what he or she wishes to pursue. This is also normal among children who grow to become entrepreneurs.
But it is something we can all master as well.
First, by making peace with our present situation. Are we or are we not where we want to be? If not, we need to identify what that place we want to be in… looks like.
Second by understanding that in order to get to where we need to be… we are going to have to change some or all aspects of our current lives. I’m specifically talking about how we go about in our day to day. Our habits and thoughts contribute more to our current way of living than we’d like to admit.
Lastly, to take action. It is not enough to desire. One must also do. One must never stop doing. One must understand that the process of doing… IS THE CHANGE. Not the outcome of the doing… but rather the doing itself.
A footballer becomes a footballer the very moment he/she enters the field and starts… footballing. We like to believe that it is when he/she has won a game for the team, but it is not. That victory is just icing on the cake. There would be no victory if there was no day 1, 2, 3, 4…. on the football field.
The life we want is in the habits we practice. The results of the habits may be attractive to the rest of the world… but those results would never have existed without the habits themselves.
If you want to win… you are going to have to want to change as well. Because unless you can truly say you are winning right now or every day… then the brutal truth is that you are not.
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